My Husband Likes to Hurt Himself

I don't know if I've blogged about past incidents, but my husband gets all weepy eyed if he stays away from the ER too long, so he likes create situations in which he needs to go get stitches.

There was the time he went to jump over a baby gate and smacked the top of his head so hard on the door jam that it knocked him right back on his keister and required six stitches.

Then there was the time that his chain saw was still winding down as he took a step forward into it and gashed his knee (because he WASN'T wearing chaps) and that required about 8 stitches.

And then there was Wednesday night. I get a message at work that goes like this, "Hi Sarah, this is Wendy. I'm driving your husband to the ER so could you meet him over there?" (Thanks for the mild heart attack there chica!)

Come to find out, this time my husband was alone in the woods in his tree stand sawing down a few branches so he could get a better view. He was sawing with his left hand (Yes, he's right handed, don't ask...I don't know!) and he had his right hand directly under the branch he was cutting (genious!) Well you guessed it, when the saw cut through the branch it continued straight on down through his hand. So he scampered down the tree, ran to the house and only had someone drive him to the ER because he couldn't drive a standard. At the ER he got 10 stitches and the doctor said like 100 times how lucky he was that he didn't cut the vein or the tendons that you could clearly see through the gaping wound. (Yes I looked, it was cool.)

The only thing he could think about was bow hunting and fly fishing. He must have tried to get the doctor to say it was okay to do these things like a million times and every time the doctor was like, "Ummm, no." "Did you hear me? No." "The answer is still NO!"

I so look forward to whatever brilliant mishap he gets himself into next and if the pattern continues we can look forward to 12 stitches!