Sep 6, 2011

Just Can't Shake This Feeling

This mama feels like she wants to crawl right out of her own skin!

Maybe it's because:



  • I have friends and family going through some pretty scary times right now.

  • We just experienced two wretched days of high heat/high humidity AFTER taking the A/C out. (And I don't DO heat.)

  • All of the house and yard projects for this place feel never-ending and impossible at times.

  • There's always just enough money, but life always seems like there's still never enough money.

  • Bathrooms are deceivingly small little spaces, but are a ROYAL pain in the BUM to edge in!

  • We are in transition between seasons right now, and I'm anxious for fall.

  • I am trying to get a routine together for Ella and I for fall and I feel in flux

  • I am planning for the start the daunting task of beginning to educate her in a more formalized way and I feel woefully inadequate!

  • I just don't do change well....in general....ever.

  • Ella has reached a stage where a lot of what she does REALLY annoys me. (There I said it. Don't pretent you've never felt that way if you've ever been a mom of a 2 1/2 year old, because I won't buy it for a second!)

  • Patience has never been a really strong virtue of mine....yet. (Trust me, HE's really working on it with me!)

  • STUFF has been driving me insane! I feel the need to, and have sorted and purged and organized and purged, and purged. But it never ends! It is the bane of my existence.

  • We're still not pregnant and I'm really wrestling with/ struggling with understanding God's will. At this point I'm fine with whatever direction He leads us in, I'd just like some clarity as to which direction that is.

  • Or maybe it's the Clomid messing with me, because yes, this hippie got so desperate she resorted to trying it.
Or maybe it's none of those things. I can't really put my finger on it. I just hope it passes and I feel normal again....or at least comfortable in my own skin. And getting it all out helped a little.

2 comments:

Amy said...

Oh Sarah :(
Just sounds like a hard freaking time right now. And when baby difficulties are involved, I think every other problem gets magnified by 5000. I hope the clomid works. I'm praying my brains out for you. I might even fast--and you know how much I love to eat ;)

Krissy said...

if it helps....
WE LOVE YOU! :)

Seriously I know you already know this; you will get through this stuff. Do call if you need anything, even just to complain. :)