Heartbeat

Our baby is only about 2 1/2 inches long. His/her little heart is only the size of a mustard seed. And yet it's fully formed. And beating. A "perfect" 152 beats per minute. Ella and I got to hear it yesterday and it is nothing short of a miracle. These things will never cease to inspire awe in me.

With Ella they did an ultrasound at 10 weeks just as routine . . . so I had already seen my baby...already had proof that she was REALLY in there . . . already watcher her wiggle around. This practice doesn't do an ulstrasound until 20 weeks, so the only proof I've had is being sick as a dog.

With the the sickness now fading away. Me not showing one little bit. And having a net weight loss of 3 pounds . . . this mama needed some proof that there's a living life inside her! Maybe that sounds weird to you, but it makes total sense to me. And I am so grateful for that muffled, rapid little whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.

But in that sweet moment, I was acutely aware of all my mama friends who haven't yet gotten to . . . or at one point didn't get to . . . for one reason or another . . . hear that wonderful sound. I know too many. It's a strange feeling for aheart to be so full and so hurting all at once. And I am praying for all of you in your journey and in your healing. <3