Rough.

Well it's official. My hubby is gone for 5 weeks. They need his awesomeness at a shipyard 3,200 miles away. And my mom has gone to be with her mom 1,000 miles away. You can feel free to send up a prayer for us!

It's just me and the babe.

And some super neighbors watching out for me.

And some fabulous friends that will be my sanity.

To add insult to injury, they usually put people up at some condos. Now I'm sure those condos are lovely...but apparently they're all full up. So my hubby is being put up here: Beachfront resort. Surrounded by water on three sides. Junior Olympic size pool, 30 person jacuzzi, fitness club, and seal pool on premesis. Granted he's there to do a very challenging job and he'll most likey be working 6 days a week, 50-60 hour weeks. But hey, he still has Sundays and evenings.

Rough.

And if it weren't for this getting out of debt plan, you better beieve I'd be on the next plane there, swimsuit and towel (and Ella) in tow!

But alas. Here we are. And there he is. And despite all that, I'm feeling strangely empowered today. I fully expect to have to depend heavily on God to get us through this time...not just get us through, but to help us flourish during this time and to help me to continue to be the mom I want to be...short on help or not, and to help keep our marriage close and healthy, 3,200 miles between us or not! It will be a definite time of growth and faith building. Not easy, but good no doubt!

Oh Happy Day!

Yesterday we paid off the last chunk on our credit card!

Wahoo!

Our card has been cut up and unused since 2008 and we've been working on it since then. So it's been a long time in the making but so awesome! BU-BYE!!!

Watch out car laon...we're comin' for you next and it's gonna be fast!

In celebration of this joyous day, please do enjoy some sweet singing!

I'm not buying it.

I took a poll yesterday and the results were unanamous. (Okay, so I asked my two girlfriends that I had over for lunch whilst our men braved the cold to catch copious amounts of large togue.)

Anyhoo, you know those moms that say how much they LOVE every... single... solitary... second they spend with their children? That say they just HATE putting their kiddos down for naps, miss them SO MUCH while they're sleeping and positively CANNOT WAIT until they wake up? The ones who say they could just NEVER, EVER leave them with others for more than a minute?

Well I'm sorry, but I'm not buying it. And neither are my two friends. (You can just save all your hatemail and judgement if you're one of those moms because in all actuality I probably just don't buy it because you're the mom I think I should be and I judge myself enough as it is!)

But here's the way I feel... and the way my two friends and I believe that 99.9% of all moms out there feel as well! I love my child. Compared to what I've seen and heard...she is ridiculously well behaved (perhaps that has to do with the unyeilding consistancy my husband and I attemt to uphold). I think staying at home with her is the best thing I have ever done...and the hardest BY FAR! And I'll be gosh darned if I don't look forward to nap time every... single... solitary... day!

I do not take parenthood lightly. I am constantly reading and researching and asking opinions. On top of the things that come naturally like cuddling, loving, laughing, playing, feeding...I am continuallyworking at being intentional in training up our child in the way she should go, teaching her about faith, instilling good morals and ethics in her, stimulating and challenging her intelectually, giving her physical and creative outlets for her energy. The way I see it, I work hard 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. I have help (a.ka. Jason) 2 hours a day during the week and some weekends.

Dispite how fabulous Ella is...she is still a two year old! Some days I swear she's an angel above all angels...and others I swear she's posessed! She tests limits, gets into mischeif, whines, cries, disobeys etc. etc. etc. Would I expect anything different from a two year old? Heck no! Are those things outweighed by the smiles, laughs, hugs, kisses, songs, games, words, stories, questions and unsurpassed adorableness? You betcha! But are they outweighed enough for me to miss her while she naps and yearn for her to wake quicker? Ummmmm, not gonna lie on this one. Nope.

Other people get breaks, lunch breaks, commutes to a from work where they get to have some peach and quiet. And I, gosh darnit, get nap time! I look forward to nap time each day like a lost, dehydrated, wandering man crossing the Sahara at noon on the hottest day of the summer yearns for a drop of fresh water. Nap time, OH GLORIOUS, nap time!

I used to utilize nap time to be all sorts of productive...Dishes, laundry, cleaning, baking, cooking, organizing. But lately I've taken to doing a quick toss of the toys back in their bins, pouring a nice hot cup of tea, grabbing my favorite book, plopping myself in a recliner next to the glowing woodstove and praying that Ella takes a long one! And if I hear her wake earlier than normal, I sure as heck am not chomping at the bit to run upstairs and get her. Nope, I get what my friend calls "the heart drop". You know, when your heart just sinks and you mutter something under your breath like, "There is NO WAY she's up already!" and you sit real quiet (as if that will help anything) and you pray that she's just making noise and will go back to sleep.

Don't worry folks. When naptime IS over and it IS time to go get my sweet one, I am just as happy as the next gal to see those half-cracked still sleepy eyes, that cute smile, those rosey just woke-up cheeks and that sweaty gnarled bed head. I'm not sure there's anything else that brings a bigger smile to my face. I'm just saying. I LOVE nap time! I don't buy it when other mommy's say they don't!

Smarty Pants

I've come to a conclusion. Our child is too dang smart for her own good and boy oh boy are we in trouble in the future unless we can learn to harness this intelligence for good :).

Here are just a few recent examples of how our little one keeps us on our toes and keeps us entertained!

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As our little family walked through Home Depot this afternoon (more on why we were there in another post- it's a good one) Jason wanted to chat about fishing without one little Ella catching on and pestering us all the days until we take her so he said, "I was thinking that if we go to the P-O-N-D to go F-I..."

Just then Ella's eyes light up and she busts in with all gusto and says, "I GO TO POND GO FISHIN'!!!!".

Both of our jaws just dropped as we turned to stare at one another and busted out laughing!

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Yesterday Ella and I were playing catch with her ball. She wouldn't throw it to me so I stuck my bottom lip out and fake cried. She got a kick out of it, giggling and saying, "Momma a baby! Momma cryin' like a baby!" Then she threw the ball to me.

Later we were in her room and she had the ball again. I asked, "Will you throw the ball to me?"

She said, "No," and quickly before I could respond she very matter-o-factly held her arm straight out, hand up palm towards me and said, "Just. Momma no cry. 'Cause Momma's not a baby. Momma's a people."

GROSS!

WARNING:

If gross things gross you out, do not look at the picture in the middle of this post!

I was supposed to be at my momma's house helping her pack. But plans changed last minute. Our puppy (or 10year old Golden Retriever, however you want to see it) had to have surgery on his eye. It turned out to be more invasive than planned (yes that also translates to more expensive - joy) and now he can't be home alone all of Jason's 13 hour days and he can't do long car ride either. So home I am...tending to our wounded little love.

What was originally thought to be an indolant ulcer (wound on eye that won't heal) that needed a simple keratotomy (play tic tac toe on dogs eye with a needle), ended up being a distichia (eyelash growing on inside of eyelid inwards toward eye...causing wound on eye that won't heal because it's constantly being scraped by said rogue eyelash) that needed ablation (zap that rogue eyelash out!).

And all that means that my dog ends up looking like this (POOR THING) for two weeks:

Yes, he still has a right eye.

It just looks like he doesn't because his third eyelid has been pulled up over his eye and stitched to the upper eylid in order for everything to heal properly.

Oh poor thing! He's eternally clumsy, unable to figure out how to manuver with this aweful cone contraption. He's forever running into things, and getting stuck on things. But probably the biggest tragedy of all is that he can't chase his beloved tennis ball because he goes full bore and slams his cone into the ground or snowbank every time he's in hot pursuit of that little yellow bouncer!

KITCHEN BEFORE AND AFTER!

Well, dang. I already posted a little too much of the kitchen in one of the pictures of Ella if I didn't want to reveal it...so here goes...finished or not.

BEFORE

AFTER

It still needs new white kickplate around the bottom of all the cabinets, new counter tops, white crown molding and new chandelier in dining room but the hard stuff is done. And with our "get out debt in one day" plan being underway, those things are non-essential and can wait!

Fashionably Late

I may have been a wee bit late to Mom's group this morning, but there were a few things that positively warranted that I stop and document this occasion:

#1) Ella asked to wear a skirt (I think this is because mom's group is held at church and we always dress her up on Sunday's).

#2) Ella asked me to put pig tails in her hair, "I want pig tails!" She exclaimed. And then she actually left them in for aprox. 10 minutes!

#3) When I asked if I could take her picture she said, "yes" then proceeded to stand relatively still and not cry. She actually said cheese and cracked a smile in a few of them!

#4) She said, "Mommy come stand here." pointing next to her. Then said, "Mommy take picture mommy ella." Then gave me kisses whilst I snapped away at arms length!

I mean seriously. Does a momma's morning get any better than that!?

So I popped out my camera and took as many pictures as I could in the 5 seconds I already didn't have to spare! Oh hour precious!

P.S. She also asked to wear the sun glasses you see in a few shots! Oh Lord help me if I have a budding fashionista!

Sweet Prayers

Ella has been praying for quite some time now. And it's always the same:

"Dear God, tank-you dis food. Tank-you go nigh-nigh."

Yes. It's that same prayer no matter what time of day or what circumstance.

Can you tell we pray with her at every meal and every bed time?

But last night during family devotion time we began to pray and she butted right in and this is what she said,"Tank-you dear God dis food. Tank-you dear God go nigh-nigh. Tank-you dear God go ow-sigh. Tank-you dear God go Lawen's house."

And at bedtime, kneeling with her head as always laid on her precious "Polor bear" (really her panda pillow pet) She said, "Tank-you dear God go night-nigh. Tank-you dear God go ow-sigh. Tank-you dear God read books mommy, daddy. Tank-you dear God go up high. Amen."

That day we had played outside, picked up her friend Lauren and taken her to story time with us, read many stories, and played a rhyme where I toss her up high in the air.

While we've modeled thanking God for things and had her repeat after us many a time before, she's not caught on until now. This was the first time she prayed like that unsolicited by us. The first time that she thought up her very own things and thanked God for them. It was a peek inside that intelligent little mind of hersand that oh, so sweet heart.

We pray daily that God will give us the wisdom to know how to impart our knowledge of Him, to know how to raise her to know him and love him, to have a relationship with Him. We pray that we will never be the kind of parents that go to church but then don't bring God into our moment by moment lives. We pray that she will see God in our daily lives, our actions...not just our words. But it all seems like such a big task and weighty responsibility. This was a small - but not small - a huge reminder that it is not our task alone to complete. It is God, through our obedience to Him and love for Him, that will show Himself to her throughout her life. It was such a ressuring confirmation that He is faithful.